Tough Day

Today was a tough day. Our 13-year-old cat, Tassel, had to be put to sleep. She had some kind of cancer, and her intestines were shutting down. She was alert and active today, but she had lost five pounds in the past few months. She just wasn’t getting any nutrients from the food she ate. Chemo might have given her a few more months, but they would have been miserable ones for her. It was a hard thing to do, to let the vet put her to sleep, but it was for the best.

Tassel both pre-dates and post-dates my marriage. In the early years of the marriage, before Hannah came along, Tassel got all the attention you’d expect a pet to get–playtime, treats, hundreds and hundreds of photos of the cute things she did. That changed a bit when Hannah was born, of course, but Tassel was still a wonderful pet, good with the kids and always very sweet.

When the divorce happened, Tassel stayed with my ex. She was already having some health problems then, so it didn’t make sense to have her move to a new home or shuttle back and forth between two homes.  So I didn’t see her as much over these last two years, but I made an effort to give her attention when I did see her. And she was always ready to purr for me when I did.

My favorite memories of Tassel are also memories of the early years of my marriage, when the relationship was working and life seemed full of promise. Watching her go today was extra hard because of that. Those days are long gone. And Tassel was a wonderful pet for many years. I’ll miss her.

This is a blog about being a dad, so I should say something about how the girls are doing. Their mother and I talked about having Hannah there at the vet’s office today. Hannah knew what had been happening to Tassel, and she knew that today might be the day that Tassel was put to sleep. But we decided that it might be too traumatic for Hannah, particularly with both of her parents crying. That was a good decision, I think.

The two of us picked Hannah up from aftercare together and let her know that Tassel had been put to sleep, that she was very sick and that there wasn’t anything we could do for her. Hannah started crying and hugging us both. She didn’t have a breakdown, but the tears were flowing, and she said she wished she could have one more day with Tassel. That just about made me break down. She’s had Tassel as a pet her entire life. She understands that Tassel was old and sick, but she misses her. She cried again with me tonight before bedtime.

We haven’t told Lily yet. The girls are with me this weekend, so she won’t notice Tassel’s absence. And she’s too young to know what’s going on. We’ll tell her when she goes back to her mom’s house.

Thanks for reading, and for letting me share this with you.